Decision Time

This is an entry I never thought I would be typing. But I'm beginning to find more and more as time goes on, that I have a tough decision to face.

As many of you know, I have been looking after my Grandmother for the past 7+ years, with little or no family support. While I do have respite care (twice a week for four hours), I'm really finding it difficult to continue.

Before some of you get your knickers in a knot, let me say I continue to love what I do for Gram. Truthfully though, the strain is beginning to get to me, especially when the rest of the family only thinks of me as a maid. And Gram doesn't say anything to discourage them or give me support when I try to voice my displeasure.

And lately, even she is beginning to fight me when I administer (give) her meds. It takes a good 20 minutes to get the meds down, and in some cases, I practically have to shove them down her throat, or she'll spit them out at me.

So my decision is this, do I ask for one more 1/2 day of respite care or do I make the choice I always swore I'd never do, ask Gram's physician to make arrangements for her to go to a care facility.

Sometimes I absolutely hate my life.