A friend left a comment on my blog yesterday. What he wanted to say how ever was too long to put in so he used his blog and then linked it through the comment section. His opinion is assisting me to achieve exactly what I wanted, a dialogue about how to defeat abuse once and for all.
My intention in my post yesterday and tonight's one is to get people talking and make them aware of the tell tale signs of abuse. The more we as a society take a stand and fight back, the less power the abusers have.
Having read it, I can understand where some people might have the idea that the plan I am proposing may result in the loss of a future Dr. Stephen Hawking or Ludwig Von Beethoven.
How do we as a society know that we have not lost them already with the deaths of children, abused and neglected each year.
I also note that what I am proposing is rather a drastic step, however I see no other way to stop the cycle of abuse than trying to come up with a workable solution.
So using my suggestion about a pre-screening test for all prospective parents and take it one step further. You have a couple newly married and wanting to start a family. The test is administered and low and behold, there's a problem. The bride's results indicate she might harm her child either before it is born or after, the test's can't narrow down the field.
Pretending to be this lady's OB-GYN, I would sit both prospective parents down in my office, explain the test results and then with cooperation from both prospective parents, come up with a plan that would enable not only the prospective mother, but teach the prospective father the warning signs to look for. And then in 6 months (minimum) to 1 year (maximum), let them retake the test and if they both pass recommend them as being suitable for parenthood.
I guess what I am trying to say is this, there are no reasons on earth for people who wish to become parents as long as the few who may inadvertently tar and feather that group are helped and given the life skills they need to stop the cycle of abuse, once and for all.
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2 comments:
This is a very good way of 'debating', I have responded in another Blog:
Mandatory Parenting School
SB
Okay, so are you suggesting being able to control who does and doesn't have children, then? Isn't that a bit like trying to play God? Medical science can only do so much, my friend; they don't have all the answers, and in some cases, it doesn't matter how many tools are provided for people to learn how to parent; abuse is going to happen.
I think that maybe what society in general needs to look at is the old concept of needing a village to raise a child. Without justifying child abuse, issues such as stress, post partum (in new mothers), and other important factors come into play - because people don't know how hard it is to raise children.
Perhaps we could look at providing potential new parents with those teaching dolls that cry and everything, instead? Give them the dolls to care for - say, for a month or two - and at the end of that time period, have the potential parents come in for a re-evaluation.
Other factors such as their own upbringing have to be taken into consideration, as well. For example, people who come from violent homes are automatically regarded as being "high risk."
I want to see an end to abuse, as well, my friend. You know this. I'm just not certain that forcing people to undergo some kind of testing is the only (or the right) answer...
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